Forget about EuroVision.  How about a music competition in the South Seas, in islands like Fiji, New Caledonia, Vanuatu, the Solomons, and Papua.  I mean, when is the last time you gave any thought at all to Vanuatu?

In 2002 Vanessa Quai's song Freedom topped the radio charts in Vanuatu and the Solomon Islands, and it ranked second on the charts in Papua New Guinea.  This is my favorite song.  She was fourteen.

Vanessa Quai was born July 13, 1988 in Port Vila, Vanuatu.  In 1999, she was one of 3000 competitors at the South Pacific International Song contest in Queensland, where she won third prize in the Gospel Category.  Later that same year, she took first prize at the Nile International Children Song Contest in Cairo, Egypt.  In 2004, she won first prize at the International Teenagers Singing Competition in Bucharest, Romania.  Her music is reportedly popular in French Polynesia, and in 2008 she became the first Melanesian singer to tour Tahiti. She sings in many languages, including French, Tok Pisin, and Motu.  Quai’s mother is Fijian, and she also sings in Fijian.

There are more than 800 languages in Papua New Guinea (PNG).  You want diversity?  Do you like diverse rock-n-roll?  Be sure to watch the middle part of this harrowing video.

I can't stop laughing at this Brazilian video.  There must be something wrong with me.

The prank begins with a young girl sitting alone and crying, waiting for a decent man or woman to appear.  Soon, normal decent human beings do approach her in order to help — as normal decent human beings will do — only to have the child reveal a scary demon blood face and chase them away.  OOOO FUN!!

 

Why isn't the Eurovision competition more popular in America?  That's right, because it's hokey.  Günther can't rap, and he scares us when he tries.  This year is as schmaltzy as ever, although a couple of acts stand out as disturbing.  First, from Austria, we have a bearded drag queen named Conchita Wurst.  Second, from Poland, we have CLEAVAGE, and lots of it.

Lyrics by Donatan & Cleo: My Słowianie (We Are Slavic)

This special thing we have in our genes
Makes us proud of our natural shapes
On Our lands you have everything you need
So pour the Vodka straight, no need to mix.
Cream and butter taste so good
We will prepare for you delicious food
Our beauty is famous all over the world
You gotta see it for yourself and then You will know

Chorus:
We're Slavic girls, we know how to use our charming beauty
Now shake what your mama gave ya!
Clap your hands to this music
This is our nature, This is our call
This is our hot Slavic blood

Note that the performance is not X-rated at all.  We just see a well endowed young lady sitting offstage churning milk in a churn.  "Cream and butter taste so good."  Oh, the symbolism!

You can see the leading Eurovision videos in this link.

I don't recommend it unless you're extremely bored.

 
There was an informative discussion on DeutscheWelle TV about East Ukranian separatists.  There are many baffling questions which I don't understand.  And who does?  Does Russia intend to grab more territory the way they did in Crimea?  Who are these "green men" wearing ski masks and Russian-looking uniforms with no insignia? 

Is Vyacheslav Ponomaryov as nutty as he seems?  He is the self-declared mayor of Slaviansk in Eastern Ukraine who arrested a group of EU observers belonging to the Organization for Security and Cooperation in Europe (OSCE).  "Mayor" Ponomaryov asserted that he had proof that at least one of the observers is a "spy," whatever that means.  Moscow says it has played no role in the uprising, but that's certainly a half-truth.

How do I know this?  Because I watch the fine German television shows on
http://www.dw.de/media-center/live-tv/s-100825

and read I The Guardian.  And because I have too much free time.

An expert on the German tv show said that many of the green men speak Russian with a true Russian -- not Ukrainian -- accent.  They must be recent arrivals.  He notes that the separatist faction is only a minority.  By a poll taken within the last year, 69% of East Ukrainians did not wish to be part of Russia.

Imagine you could only receive Fox News and nothing else.
Most people in Ukraine do not use the internet or read the newspapers.  They get their news from television, and for Russian speakers, this means Moscow TV.  As a result, every America-is-evil conspiracy that Putin cooks up is delivered unfiltered to the Ukrainian ear.

Wow.  I just discovered the YouTube series Real Actors Read.  In this video, the actress reads a whacko comment in a Christian forum.  You can find more RAR VIDEOS in Youtube.  There are weird reviews from Yelp, Craigslist, and Twitter.

I know visitors do not generally click on videos, but these are short.  And they're hilarious.  Judy Gold reads a review about being bent over and raped with high prices:

Actress Therese Plummer finds a dish capable of demolishing even the stiffest constipation.

Worldwide news vidcasts in English are surprisingly easy to find.  In English!  All of the following broadcasts have the latest stories about the Ukraine, the South Korea Ferry, election results, et cetera.  They are well produced and entertaining.

 

The South China Morning Post (Hong Kong) is sometimes racy [ LINK ]

A state sponsored broadcast from Beijing is also available if you need propaganda. [ LINK ]

 

France has a nice vidcast ... [ LINK ]

 

The German (Deutsche Welle) vidcast is real competent.  They tend to like animals for some reason. [ LINK ]

 

Here is the news from Kiev Ukraine.  [ LINK ]  Jesus, what a find.  In the following feature, KyivPost.com interviews survivors of the 1933 Holodomor genocide in which 7.5 million Ukrainians died of starvation.  It illustrates why the Ukraine will not be easily annexed by Russia.

 

The latest "news" from Moscow?

Also, don't miss the news broadcast from ...

Jakarta

Hungary

Australia

Canada

UAE (persian gulf)

Telegraph, UK

 

This is my heartbleed strategy for what it's worth.  My online banking site password will be changed, obviously, along with my 2013 tax efile password.  Also every site that has my social security number or mother's maiden name.  I do not have a credit card, but I did get a debit card last month, and with it, five new purchase sites to secure.

Email sites are vulnerable, say the experts, in particular Google, Yahoo, and Youtube.  I can't think of any email messages I've sent containing protected information, but probably a clever identity thief would find something.  Here is a core list of heartbleed bug websites, which includes email servers:
http://mashable.com/2014/04/09/heartbleed-bug-websites-affected/

I found a browser app that displays a warning message whenever I visit a heartbleed-vulnerable site.  It runs in google chrome.  I compiled a complete list of all my passwords, and the next step is to test and change them if needed.

I found a free password manager that generates funky strings like v!=~Mnp95XB{.  I can click on a site and then paste the new ridiculous password.  It’s pretty easy.

"Security experts warn that attackers exploiting the heartbleed vulnerability could use it to impersonate a server.  A server’s private keys are used to generate certificates that prove that a server is legitimate, similar to the way we use passports and other forms of ID to prove who we are.  Now a vulnerable banking or credit card site can be impersonated by an attacker who might use it to lure unwitting users to hand over their account names and passwords." (from recode.net)

And it's not just identity theft we're subject to.  There are hackers who want to enslave you, i.e., take control of your computer in a concerted denial of service attack.

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That being said, here's some entertainment:

 
Last year I typed the number of dependents, tax withheld, gross income, et cetera, and hit the send button.  I swear it was much easier then.  I simply promised to mail in my W-2 forms within a couple of days, or in a couple of months, or whenever I felt it was convenient.

This year I downloaded the 1040 instructions and 1040 form -- in editable PDF format -- and filled it in in about a half an hour.  (Sounds simple, but I was only able to do this after sweating for a week about where I put my records from 2013 and 2012.)

The problem is that this year there was no IRS portal to upload my form to.  Instead, I was given a list of "free" tax preparers, such as H&R Block, that were willing to accept my intimate data details and submit them to the IRS.  I got a new password.  I got a personal pin number.  I got an official pin number, which somehow is not the same thing.  Fine.  I get that the agency is run by liberals and probably too busy harassing the right-wing PACs to serve the public.

The "free" tax form contained twice as many questions as the 1040 form.  I had to stipulate over and over that I did not have any wives that were over sixty-five, or blind, or disabled, or on medication, or wrinkled, or in a nursing home.  On the (gasp) fifteenth screen, the god damned program told me my federal tax form was ready to submit, but I would have to pay $29.95 to submit my state tax form.  Bastards.  It would have required another hour to backtrack and delete all the state-related answers, so I acquiesced.  I paid up.  Then the program politely told me that my state tax form was not needed this year, so they wouldn't be sending it in.

 

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Who needs this?  I'd rather listen to Buddy Guy.

Even in 1965 we knew Buddy Guy was a genius.  I can listen to his guitar solos over and over on All Night Long.  His stunning creativity never fades.

The album is Chicago/The Blues/Today! Vol. 1

Junior Wells (Harmonica & Vocal)
Buddy Guy (Guitar)
Jack Myers (Bass)
Fred Below (Drums)